Hype Machine

Dear Blog

2011-03-24T19:04:00.000-07:00

Dear Hypemachine,

I will update you soon. Pinky swear.

Hugs,
jp

Compare and Contrast

2010-10-08T09:36:00.000-07:00

It's time to figure out a new digital camera. One would think this would bring me great joy but in all reality I hate shopping for new stuff like this. Comparing and contrasting this model vs. that model...and all trying to do it within the budget I'm allotted. Dear Burglars, F-you.

Dear Burgler(s)

2010-09-29T10:24:00.000-07:00

You came into my house Monday afternoon. Through my bedroom window. I was not home, but if I were you would not have been psyched with what I would have done to you.

Among other things, you took my iMac, my laptop and my camera (pictured). These were all really nice things. They're also replaceable - unlike your face if I ever see you in my neighborhood again. But what isn't replaceable are the photos you also took from me. Photos...memories that I'll never get back. Memories of mine that I'll never be able to share with family or friends. You took my creative kit and without such I am unable to participate in one of my most favorite hobbies, that of photography, and sharing it with whomever cares to look at how I see things.

You took bits of my soul. And my bath towel (which was probably used to cover up the iMac). I wiped my ass with that bath towel you shits. Now it's all over my iMac....or whoever else owns it now after purchasing it at a pawn shop.

You left no fingerprints for the cops to trace. But you scattered bits and pieces of dirt all over my bed when you came in through my window. Thanks. Assholes. You tore apart my roommate's room - but left all his cool shit. WTF? Not good enough for you?

You're off running around with a cool, fast, coupla' hundred bucks in your pocket to float you 'till your next job. Meanwhile I've had to turn parts of my life completely upside down, putting aside fun things and other things I'd rather be doing in order to deal with the cops, insurance and more or less not being able to do so many things that I love.

There are multitudes of things I would enjoy doing and saying to you. Many of which would land me behind bars. But unlike you, I'm going to take the high road. I'm not going to break into your house (if you live in one) and I'm not going to steal your shit (if you have any). No. Rather, a suggestion....

There's a place for you. A place that will gladly open it's arms and welcome you in. A place where you can rot. A place where you think it's cool but when you open your eyes you realize it's really not. No, it's not hell. It's a place called Boulder*. Boulder, CO; and considering the prospective clientele of that area, you'll probably do very well there. I suggest using some of that stolen money you 'earned' after stealing my property to help pay your way in getting there.

*Author's note: nothing personal to friends or friends of friends who are from or currently reside there.

Hey Salt Lake, I Fu*kn Love You

2010-08-25T14:10:00.000-07:00

Happy anniversary, sweetie. Nine years ago today I landed here and immediately fell in love at first sight. I fall in love with you more every day. Thanks for being you and letting me do the things I love to do right in our back yard. Preserve the sexy, you fine piece of city.

Most Definitely a Gift

2010-08-03T23:57:00.000-07:00

This just makes me want to get the most out of my life that I possibly can; doing the things I love to do.

The Barnes & Noble Bathroom Experience

2010-08-03T12:42:00.000-07:00

Several people that know me also know that I friggen' love Barnes & Noble. It's by far one of my most favorite places to go when I've got nothing else going on, or when it's time to flip through the newest Surfer's Journal.

Every now-and-again the urge to do the business (drop trow, lay pipe, take the kids to the pool, etc...) will randomly strike me while flipping through readables at the magazine rack. Now, being one who isn't terrified of the public restroom, I quietly duck out to take care of the task at hand. Usually everything goes as planned. Except this one time. Join me, while I paint you this one-of-a-kind picture.

The Sugarhouse B & N (closest to my casa) men's room has three stalls. Two 'regular' stalls and then the handicapped stall at the end. Now, I try to avoid using the handicapped stall when regular stalls are available out of principle. I opened the door to the first stall - not a pretty sight. The next (regular) stall was occupied by a relative unknown, forcing me into my last option. Whew, the handicapped stall was both unoccupied and clean.

I posted up and began working on the project at hand (really trying to stay away from the typical bathroom jargon, here). I started flipping through texts on my phone and deleting old messages to pass the time and keep my mind occupied. But, while doing so, I couldn't help but notice the man's feet in the stall next to me. Correct me if I'm wrong, but not many people sit down with their feet pointing out at 90-degree angles. Nor do their feet twitch nervously - unless they're really bearing down and growling one out (sorry...descriptions you could do without...). All signs were pointing to 'no' with regards to this fella having b.m. troubles. Then it happened. An audible noise. No. Not a burp. Or a fart. Or a laugh, even. Any of those would have been welcomed. Rather, on the other side of the stall wall, I could hear a faint, "Whap, whap, whap." Then silence. Then more, "Whap, whap, whap." Then some rustling of whatever this dude was 'reading.' Then a few more whaps..."Whap, whap, whap."

Yeah, you get the idea. If you don't, share this with a friend and maybe they'll see what I'm getting at with regards to what this dude was up to. Needless to say, I cut this particular trip to the men's room short and got the hell out of there.

I still love me some B & N, though.

That Dog Named Joe

2010-08-03T10:24:00.000-07:00

I moved into the place I currently live somewheres around October of 2007. This is now, officially, the longest I've lived in any single dwelling outside of my parent's house. I can hear the faint round of applause; thank you.

One fall afternoon back in the stacks of 2007, I recall being outside; I was bringing groceries in from my car. It was after work. I'd probably had a long day. And as I was walking up the sidewalk to my front door I remember hearing the lady across the street shouting. It went kind of like this:

"JOE! Come back here! Get over here! NOW!! JOE!!! Inside, now!!!"

So tell me, what the hell would you have done? Probably exactly what I did - never looked back and got inside the (my) house as fast as I could.

Instances similar to this kept occurring, randomly, over the next few weeks. Granted, it's my own fault I never went over to see what she needed me for. Then I met Joe; well, the other Joe, at least. The Joe that this lady had been shouting at the whole time. This Joe in particular stands, on all fours, about 12 inches off the ground, barks ferociously at times and actually comes to his owner on command.

People names for pets....now I know we can do better...

Razor Burn

2010-07-30T09:02:00.000-07:00

In these 27 years I've woken up to some shit. I'm sure you have, too. Room mate having puked all over your bookshelf in college? Check. Room mate puking on the wall/floor while he sleeps. Check. All the furniture in your house turned upside down? Check. Front window in your house smashed through? Check. Car broken into? Check. Eggs smashed all over your car? Check. My Dad rapping on my second story bedroom window when he locked himself out late one night after returning from a biz trip. Yeah, Check. The neighbors next door having gratuitously loud sex? ....Check.

This morning, however, I woke up to this:

Shaving cream. And the shit smelled like mint, too. So, to whomever decided the stubble on my Element was a little too rough, you missed a few spots.

After you tagged my car I hope you passed out in a gutter somewhere, waking up this morning to a few teeth gone missing from falling flat on your face in life and wishing you had something better to live for than defacing people's property.

The Quiver of One

2010-07-27T14:20:00.000-07:00

I'll preface this post in that it's been long, way too long, since I last smeared some food-for-thought here. I've had a lot on my mind lately, though, so keep coming back because I'll be updating this piece more regularly; that's for sure. Just be glad I never deleted this blog - I almost did a few months ago (I can feel the sighs of relief from the peanut gallery). However, I'm glad I didn't.

If you know me well-enough, you know I hate...no...absolutely despise, the use of the word 'quiver' in describing one's arsenal of skis. Quiver? Really? Do you keep your skis in a tube that you sling over your shoulder? Do you? Honestly? Didn't think so. Do you ski on arrows? Of course not. They suck in the fresh. Am I speaking from personal experience? No. But I could be. There in lies my issue with this word being used in that sense.

Now, I'm not here to harp on the word quiver; I promise, even though I kind of just did. My initial intention for this post is to share some exciting news about skis. There is no single ski that "does it all." There's no such thing as a "quiver of one" (there we go again...). If ski companies made a ski that did it all it would a) suck big time b) they wouldn't make any money* and c) the skiers would be left with a paltry pool of skis to choose from. Where's the fun in any of that? Fun you say? Here's a picture of fun at the Huck House II, c.2005 - well, at least this was fun, until we needed to get to our food.

Like every other American, I'm of the philosophy that it's best to have as many / much of something as one possibly can. Well, kind of. Actually, I'm not. But really, no one needs tens upon tens of pairs of skis - nor should they have just one that "does everything" (or so they were told). Out in the real world you probably only need two pairs of skis: one for pow days and one for everything else.

Now, we're not going to get into which skis are good for what and so on and blah blah blah...figure all that out on your own (or you can just email me, I'm happy to hook up some legit info if you're truly seeking it). But honestly, pony-up for a set of pow sticks (110mm or fatter under your footies) and pick up a groomer ski (90mm - 110mm underfoot) with whatever is left over ;)

Oh. And it's great to be back!

*ski companies making money - this is another topic completely unto itself. Doubtful that we'll visit that later on....but who knows.

Snow

2010-02-10T15:51:00.001-08:00

The east coast has been getting hammered as of late. Quite the opposite out here in Utah.

This stuff just isn't fun unless you can ski...or rally your car...in it.

Bear with me on the lame 15-second advertisement at the beginning here; I cherry-picked this off KSL.com.

Video Courtesy of KSL.com

Avatar: 3D

2010-01-29T09:16:00.000-08:00

Went and saw Avatar in 3D last night. Sigourney Weaver sure has come a long way since Ghostbusters...

Truth

2010-01-21T09:41:00.000-08:00

The Truth About Powder Skis. Super convoluted, but super true in so many respects. It's sad to realize how much media hype has affected the simple sport of skiing. But this little antidote is great for some laughs.

After

2010-01-20T12:03:00.001-08:00

I'm still kicking myself in the face for not taking the 'before' pictures. So it goes. Bottom line, this reconfiguration looks good and we're happy with it.

And from the side...

Rocking the Triple Entendre

2010-01-13T10:15:00.001-08:00

There is hope.

Speechless

2009-12-29T12:08:00.000-08:00

This is probably the stupidest thing I've seen to date. As in my entire life. “It will do for skiing what ‘Jaws’ did for swimming.” Oh, will it? Or will it be an epic waste of your time, money and soul? How a movie like this even made it to production is beyond me. I'd rather sit in a dark bathroom with only a jar of fingernails to eat than sit through this, probably the worst movie of 2010...

Waxing Poetic

2009-12-29T09:17:00.000-08:00

With the end of 2009 coming ever more near I've seen some pretty cool montage videos summing up the main events that occurred during this roller coaster year. You know what though? Montage videos can suck it. Ain't nothin' more back to the basics than sitting down in your favorite chair and kicking back with a good book. On that note, I found this recap of the last decade to be very interesting and a great read. Maybe you will, too.

A decade that left a mark on U.S. History
By Rick Hampson, USA TODAY

The decade began with a national sigh of relief — no Y2K terrorist attack or computer meltdown. A traveler named Luis Salcedo, boarding a flight in New Orleans on Jan. 1, 2000, summed it up: "Nothing to worry about now."

Not with the lowest unemployment rate in nearly 30 years and a stock market that had just closed at a historic high. Not in the world's only superpower.

But it wasn't going to be that smooth — not America's trip through the next 10 years, nor Salcedo's trip to Washington.

After takeoff, the 727 developed a hydraulic system leak and had to land using a backup system. Emergency vehicles were waiting at Washington Dulles International Airport and followed the plane as it rolled to a stop at the end of a runway. "Last time I'm booking a flight on the first," Salcedo said.

So began a decade when America experienced its worst attack by foreigners and its worst natural disaster; its second-deadliest domestic plane crash, and the most divisive, protracted presidential election since 1876.

DECADE GALLERY: A look back at the last 10 years

There were two wars, both longer than World War II; two stock market crashes; and two recessions, including the worst since the Great Depression.

The first African-American president was inaugurated in a city where, 60 years earlier, Barack Obama's father couldn't have sat at the same lunch counter as a white man.

Americans learned that there was water on the moon and that Tiger Woods wasn't perfect.

Wikipedia, Twitter, YouTube, MySpace, Facebook, Skype and Hulu all debuted, as did the iPod, the iPhone and iTunes. Books were joined by e-books. Television broadcasting moved from analog to digital, and TV viewing from cathode ray tubes to flat screens.

In Boston, the Curse of the Bambino that had hung over the Red Sox for the better part of a century was broken.

An interstate highway bridge collapsed, a space shuttle exploded and Michael Jackson died young. Ted Kennedy died knowing that 45 million people in the USA had no health insurance.

The price of oil rocketed from less than $25 to almost $150 a barrel, before dropping to half that.

Deranged gunmen slaughtered the innocent and unsuspecting in places that seemed safe, including a suburban shopping mall, a college campus and an Army post. Scandal erupted almost everywhere, from an Iraqi military prison to Wall Street to K Street.

For the first time, foreign carmakers captured more than half the U.S. market, and two of the Big Three automakers — modestly renamed the Detroit Three — filed for bankruptcy.

Diversions from 21st-century cares were plentiful: American Idol and Lost, Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers, Call of Duty and Halo. Mad Men began; Friends ended.

The general lexicon gained words (unfriend, reality TV, hoteling, waterboarding), expressions ("axis of evil," "toxic assets") and slogans ("No credit? No problem!").

What kind of decade was it? How big? How bad? Historians will tell you it's too soon to pass judgment. But what strikes many of them is the sheer pace of change.

Paul Boyer, who recently updated the last chapter of the U.S. history college textbook he co-authors, The Enduring Vision, is amazed, for example, at how quickly America went "from a remarkable moment of unity after 9/11 to the most intense political factionalism."

To appreciate how tumultuous a decade it was, go back to that first day, when Pluto was still a planet and a typical cellphone weighed 7.7 ounces, twice as much as today.

At the start

We know how the decade turned out; this is how it began.

Shortly after midnight CT, Jose Ramierez-Saucedo, a 19-year-old Mexican, wades across the Rio Grande, where he becomes the decade's first illegal immigrant arrested on the Texas border.

About an hour later Marcus Perlas is born in the heart of Silicon Valley. As the first baby of 2000 at Mountain View's El Camino Hospital, he wins 10 shares of Silicon Graphics stock (worth $96.90 at the time) and a single share of Yahoo (worth $432.69). "We're going to keep it in the baby's portfolio," says his mom. "He's a born businessman, I guess."

It's a Saturday. When the sun rises in the east at a bit after 7, Americans still have not agreed on what to call the new decade. The Oughts? The Naughts?

The headline on page one of Denver's Rocky Mountain News proclaims: WORLD FINDS Y2 IS OK AROUND THE PLANET.

It's a time of dial-up computer connections, foldable road maps and 5-pound phone books. When people want to trade a stock or make a reservation, they pick up the phone. They also lick stamps, check answering machines, flip Rolodexes and insert floppy discs.

For most, times are good. According to a USA TODAY-Gallup Poll, 69% of Americans are satisfied with the way things are going in the country. More than three-quarters of those in the work force say it's a good time to look for a job, and only 14% of Americans are extremely or very worried about their economic situation.

The previous week new unemployment claims fell by 9,000 to 274,000. General Motors, the world's largest automaker, is planning to create 1,000 jobs in North Carolina at a new call center for its OnStar in-vehicle information service.

The only potential problem is a diminishing supply of workers: Some jobs are going unfilled for lack of qualified applicants.

The No. 1 TV series is Who Wants to be a Millionaire. The No. 1 millionaire is Microsoft chairman Bill Gates, worth $91 billion.

Enron, the seventh-biggest U.S. corporation with annual revenue of $101 billion, has been named "America's Most Innovative Company" by Fortune magazine four straight years. Its chairman, Kenneth Lay, received compensation in 1999 worth $42.4 million.

Barack Obama, an Illinois state senator from Chicago, has declared his candidacy for the congressional seat held by a fellow Democrat, a four-term-incumbent. Sarah Palin, re-elected with 74% of the vote, begins her second term as mayor of Wasilla, Alaska.

Vermont legislators face an order issued Dec. 20 by the state Supreme Court: Grant gay and lesbian couples the right to marry or craft an alternative system to provide them with equal rights.

The USS Cole, having won a holiday light decoration award at its Navy base in Norfolk, Va., prepares for maneuvers in the Atlantic.

Almost 2 million people are in prison. None is named Jack Abramoff, Dennis Kozlowski, Jeffrey Skilling, Bernard Ebbers or Bernard Madoff.

Warning signs missed

The SEC has just investigated a complaint that Madoff's investment firm is hiding customers' orders from other traders. Madoff has agreed to take corrective measures.

A project to strengthen New Orleans' hurricane defenses, started after Hurricane Betsy in 1965, is years behind schedule. Projected completion date: 2015. Future FEMA director Michael Brown is working for the International Arabian Horse Association.

Toyota is promoting its high-mileage hybrid, the Prius, on sale in the USA this summer. GM, sensing a lack of demand for such cars, is about to cancel work on the Precept, a prototype model that can get 80 miles a gallon.

It has been 81 years since the Boston Red Sox won the World Series and 80 years since they sold Babe Ruth to the Yankees. The team's last heartbreak came in October, when the Yankees beat them in the American League championship series.

Baseball's biggest hero is Mark McGwire, who in 1998 broke the single-season home run record and who last season hit 65 home runs — followed, as in '98, by Sammy Sosa, who hit 63.

Rachael Ray is working at a gourmet market in Albany, N.Y., where customers' reluctance to cook has given her the idea for a course, book and local TV segment called 30 Minutes Meals.

Miley Cyrus and Nick Jonas are 7 years old.

Osama bin Laden, named to the FBI's Most Wanted List six months ago and under indictment for the bombings of U.S. embassies in Africa in 1998, is somewhere in Afghanistan. He recently has given Khalid Sheikh Mohammed approval to proceed with a plot to hijack U.S. airliners and fly them into buildings. A group of the plot's participants has arrived in Afghanistan from Germany, including a man named Mohamed Atta.

A year after U.S. missile strikes on Iraq, Saddam Hussein clings to power; his police state has become more like a prison state. One lockup, Abu Ghraib, has as many as 15,000 inmates.

In Green County, Pa., Chuck Graner is a prison guard at the state prison, where he's been accused of mistreating black and Muslim inmates. In West Virginia, Frankfort High School junior Lynndie England is a new member of the Army Reserve. Both will become U.S. military guards at Abu Ghraib, and for their crimes there wind up behind bars themselves.

About 10 a.m., a man in Muhlenberg Township, Pa., calls 911 to report that he shot his family. Police find the bodies of Henry Peffer, 46, his wife and three children from her previous marriages.

Over the next decade, Peffer's successors in mass murder will explode across the nation, from Fort Hood to an Omaha shopping mall to Virginia Tech.

Nidal Hasan is a student at the U.S. military's medical school in Bethesda, Md.

At 11, Robert Hawkins of Omaha already has suffered through five years of psychological problems, including hospitalization for depression.

Seung Hui Cho, 15, a middle school student in Centreville, Va., has been diagnosed with a severe anxiety disorder and depression.

On this placid New Year's Day 2000, so much else is happening beneath the surface.

FBI agent Robert Hanssen has re-established contact with the SVR, one of Russia's successors to the Soviet-era KGB, with the intention of resuming an epic spying career that will end in his arrest the following year.

Bruce Ivins, a scientist at the government's biodefense labs at Fort Detrick in Maryland, is studying the potential use of anthrax as a biological weapon. It's an expertise he'll allegedly put to deadly use in the fall of 2001. When the FBI finally closes in seven years later, Ivins will kill himself with nothing more exotic than a common pain reliever.

In Minneapolis, it's been 10 years since the Interstate 35W bridge over the Mississippi River was rated "structurally deficient" because of corrosion in its bearings.

No one's too worried; tens of thousands of other bridges in the nation have the same federal classification.

Full of promise

For better or worse, the future is ripe as the decade begins.

Craig Newmark, founder of an online network with free classified ads, incorporated last year and plans to expand into nine more U.S. cities this year. He calls his site Craigslist.

Later in the year, Sony will release Play Station II and 'N Sync will release No Strings Attached. The TV series Survivor and Curb Your Enthusiasm will premiere.

AOL, the world's largest online service, will buy Time Warner. Federal agents will take 6-year-old Elian Gonzalez from a relative's home in Miami and hand him over to his father, who will take the boy back to Cuba.

In two weeks, the Dow Jones average will peak at 11,723; after that, the dotcom bubble will burst. But that won't stop the information revolution.

Chad Hurley, who will co-create YouTube, has just graduated from college in Pennsylvania and joined PayPal, where he's been asked to design a logo for the online payment service.

Jack Dorsey, who will create Twitter, has dropped out of New York University and moved to the San Francisco Bay area, where he's about to start a business that will use Internet messages to dispatch taxis, couriers and emergency vehicles.

Mark Zuckerberg, who will create Facebook, is in middle school in Dobbs Ferry, N.Y., where he's started to develop computer programs.

For many, the day ends with college football. Led by quarterback Tom Brady, Michigan — making its 33rd consecutive post-season bowl game appearance — stages a come-from-behind, 35-34 overtime victory over Alabama in the Orange Bowl.

Virginia Tech and Florida State, both 11-0, meet Tuesday for the national championship. Tech's freshman quarterback seems to have a bright future. His name is Michael Vick.

Ten years later, we look back at the wild ride and wonder what it meant.

After the historian's disclaimer — "still too early to say" — Michael Stoff of the University of Texas suggests that even the decade's disasters might serve a purpose. The 9/11 attacks and global warming, for example, showed that problems such as terrorism and climate change are too broad to be solved by one nation.

"I'm always struck by how bad things look close-up," he says. "They look different when your nose isn't pressed up against the mirror."

Contributing: Adam Silverman of TheBurlington (Vt.) Free Press; Kathleen Gray of the Detroit Free Press; Associated Press

2009-12-21T13:35:00.001-08:00

A friend at work sent this out the other day. I think I'm somewhere still near the beginning...

GoPro

2009-12-17T09:52:00.000-08:00

My roommate and I picked up a GoPro Hero Wide HD camera a couple weeks ago. These things are actually pretty fun to mess around with. Excited to see what other nonsense we can come up with as the season goes on. Here's a quick edit Ty put together from the footage we got last Sunday at Brighton.

Early Season Pow - Brighton, UT 12.2009 from Joe Penacoli on Vimeo.

The Snowbird Syndrome

2009-12-14T10:51:00.000-08:00

I feel bad. I have no pics with which to enhance this short post.

So, the 'Snowbird Syndrome,' as recently coined this weekend while skiing at Brighton, is a fear for skiing where, technically, you shouldn't.

In short, at Brighton, as long as there isn't a 'closed' sign posted, you can duck ropes and get to the good stuff. At Snowbird you risk losing your pass for this 'bad behavior.'

This doesn't excuse the fact that you still need to make wise decisions when skiing out of bounds. Have fun.

A Struggle

2009-12-03T09:18:00.000-08:00

Sometimes that's what this blog is. A struggle. Not in the sense that I lose sleep over, but in the sense that I'll ignore it at times, let it go by the wayside and when I do finally catch up with myself I have a hard time committing to making updated posts. Tough, right? Enough introspection.

Life is full of unknowns - I think these two photos I took express this fact in their own ways.

My buddy Josh, a fisheye, his palm and the obvious.

The depth of field on this makes it a little hard to read, but Calvin is spot-on with his philosophy. "Well, each decision we make determines the range of choices we'll face next." Well put, little buddy.

Older Stock

2009-11-14T17:27:00.000-08:00

Tina gave me an external hard drive for my birthday at the beginning of this month. I was in the process of moving photo files onto it and came across these two shots of Mike and Jerry playing around on some dirt jumps outside of Park City last summer.

The Following Was Brought to You By...

2009-11-12T14:43:00.000-08:00

The Yankees beat the Phils in a super-star six-game World Series. Old news. I know. And I lost my $50 bet with a co-worker. Maybe next year. Until then, New Yorkers have something they can smile about while sitting in traffic wondering, "Why...why do I live here...why do I pay thousands of $$$ for rent each month...why do I pay tolls....why don't I move to New Jersey?" Maybe. Anything's possible. Just don't move to Philly, in which case you run this risk.

On a better note, there are tons of murals in Philadelphia. Some really good, some not so great. Like this one.

Paul likes to exercise his constitutional right of coloring outside the lines.

Switching gears with a trip to the Aquarium, here's a picture of a jelly fish doing it's thing.

And a fish, just chillin'.

Moving on...

Climbing and Wagers

2009-10-28T15:37:00.000-07:00

I climb. Not like I ski. But I like to dabble. A group of us from the workplace were down at the Swell this past weekend. It was a blast. On the wager side, the Phillies are in the World Series. Again. A buddy of mine at work put $50.00 on the Yanks....I shook his hand and accepted the bet. Now I've got to watch some baseball...

Here's a photo dump of the climbing pics. Sorry, no route info. We were in the Buckhorn Wash area of the Swell...

Click on this one (above), then 'all sizes' to do it justice...

B&W shoutout..

Weekend

2009-10-23T12:51:00.000-07:00

Back from a little jaunt on the Right Coast - wedding, family, food, stocking up on fat reserves for the winter; you know the drill.

Heading to the Swell for the weekend with a motley crew from work. Should be a rowdy time. Will report on happenings when we return.

For now, here's a shot of a roadside waterfall up Big Cottonwood.

Littering And....

2009-09-21T08:39:00.000-07:00

No, not smoking the reefer. Super Troopers is a damn good movie, though.

If you've ever been to Las Vegas, I'm sure you'll agree that place is the litterbox of the US. It's probably the filthiest city I've ever been to. Even driving into Nevada, as soon as you cross over the border from UT into NV, the pavement turns to crap and you begin seeing garbage scattered about the sides of the road and tangled in the weeds in the median. How is it that people still think it's ok to toss waste out the windows of their vehicles?

The other day I was heading up I-80 to Park City. I checked my rear view mirror and noticed a kind fellow riding my ass, in his Audi Allroad. My standard reaction in this instance is to begin coasting, generally slowing down once I take my foot off the gas pedal. Usually, this frustrates the tailgater, prompting them to swerve into another lane, slam on the gas pedal (decreasing their MPGs, ooooh checkmate suckerz...) and leave me in their dust.

Now, even though I shouldn't, I give them the obligatory stare as they pass me and I'll typically just smile or wave, hoping to see them pulled over at some point on the side of the road. However, in this particular instance, while the driver was laying on the horn his ugly girlfriend decided to toss her beverage from McDoo out the window as they passed me - spraying backwash and ammo-dumping ice cubes onto the pavement at breakneck speed. Please also note that I was going 75mph in a 65mph zone; so these goodies were probably going 80mph or faster when they passed me displaying their utmost class. No, I didn't write down their plate number. No, I didn't tail gate them back. But I made sure to pick up the next piece of trash I saw later on that day and toss it out. I'm such a boyscout.

The point of this blurb is to say thanks to my Mom for instilling in me the fact that littering gets us nowhere. I remember riding home after Mom took me through the drive-thru at, ironically, McDoo's, when I was a wee sprout (probably four or five years old). I had finished my drink and went to toss the cup out the car window. Mom caught me in the middle of this terrible act I was about to commit just before I was able to release my excited hands - dropping the cup on the ground as we drove down the road. She told me I better not drop that cup or I'd be in for it when I got home. Instead, Mom let me know that I could instead throw the cup into the street from our driveway. A great compromise.

I sat patiently for the rest of the car-ride home. I was prepping myself, getting ready to throw this cup as far as I possibly could from the edge of the driveway. As soon as we pulled into the driveway and the car was stopped, I jumped out of the car, sprinted to the end of the driveway (probably 10 feet), spiked the cup on the ground like my child-hood hero, John Elway, and stomped it flat like a pancake. I proceeded to peel the cup off the pavement, grinning at my destruction, and hail-married that thing into the center of the neighborhood road.

The crushed cup sat in the middle of the road while I stared at it from the end of my parent's driveway. It wasn't transforming into something magical, it wasn't changing colors, it wasn't getting up and walking away on it's own. It just sat there. I became severely bummed. In the experience I had gained in my four or five years of life, I thought littering was the cool thing to do. Mom was smart - inadvertently teaching me a lesson without me knowing. Shortly after realizing the cut wasn't going to do any good in the street, I went a picked it up and tossed it in the garbage.

That's me; the litterbug.

Thanks, Mom.

Greenday

2009-09-17T09:07:00.000-07:00

I was 12, in the sixth grade (1994) and didn't know much about anything (still don't). I had just gotten a stereo with CD player one year before and the first two CDs that were given to me will remain un-mentioned.

With some money from Christmas that year I went and purchased Greenday's first commercially-produced album, Dookie. A couple of my buddies in the neighborhood also got it, but their parents took it away from them once they learned how many times the F-word was used in the lyrics.

My parents didn't ever really ask or seem to concerned about any of the music I've listened to, especially when I was growing up. I guess it pays to be a good kid sometimes.

I still have the Dookie CD and pop it in every now and then; Welcome to Paradise brings me back to living in Delaware, hating life and not knowing much about anything. All great feelings to be reminded of on a given day.

Pee Chee Folders

2009-08-11T14:19:00.000-07:00

Man - At the beginning of each school year I was perhaps most excited about getting a new fleet of Pee Chee folders. Their soft colors and generic sports illustrations were way ahead of their time, that's for sure. Another great quality of the Pee Chee is that the folder's pockets run vertically, so if you pitch the folder upside down, all your crap stays neat and organized inside and doesn't come sliding out the top of the folder.

Bro Brah Ra Cha

2009-08-07T09:43:00.000-07:00

Shaka bra...BRO!!! Man, I'm psyched when people are psyched. Like this surfer dude.

Chaa!!! Yeaaah!!! This guy watched too many Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a kid.

On another note, I believe I have a cyber stalker. The individual refers to themself as DINGO. DINGO, meet my readers - readers, meet DINGO. DINGO refuses to reveal his/her real identity to me, but knows a surprising amount of information dating back to when I was (or we were?) in college. DINGO frequently leaves comments on my blog - all of which I refuse to verify for posting because they're nonsense b.s. DINGO may be reached at m.burest@gmail.com (some other faux identity as I don't recognize that name, either) if you have any questions, comments or concerns regarding their obsession with bugging the sh*t out of me.

Oh yeah, how about that sufer dude? Watch that clip above again - and forget about DINGO.

Hey Subaru - You Done F#%&@D Another Car Up

2009-07-29T10:39:00.000-07:00

My first blog post was back in October of 2007 - when Subaru gave the Impreza hatchback an unnecessary facelift. Look at that thing. Makes you wanna puke, doesn't it?

Well, as we all know (or at least those that know...know..), Subaru re-upped the Forrester and turned it into a BMW X3-wannabe. I'm not even going to post a picture because I can't stand how terrible the new Forrester looks. Look it up on your own if you really want to see one, or maybe check your neighbor's driveway. Here, this is the old-style (at it's peak):

Badass, right? Well, the new one is the exact opposite of the old style.

It doesn't end here, folks. The boys at Subaru are at it again and they've done ruined another, formerly, great looking automobile, the Subaru Outback. Like the new Forrester, I refuse to post any pictures of the 2010 Outback. It's hideous. It makes me want to crawl back into the womb. It's a terrible sign of things to come. Along with my '92 Loyale blowing up (see a few posts below), I'm officially disenchanted with Subaru as a whole and am shopping another Japanese car brand to turn my current two-wheel situation (bike) into a four-wheel situation (car). Tina, babe, I still like your Impreza....

Oh, and if you want to puke, check out the new Outback here: PUKE

About Ben

2009-07-22T09:40:00.000-07:00

Ben and I go way back. My first memory of this guy dates back to the 6th grade in study hall. We didn't know each other at the time and I was sitting up front like a nerd. Ben was cooler than me at this point in time - he was sitting in the back - making jokes about the teacher and laughing with a buddy. I thought they were making fun of me and I tried my hardest to not let their antics bug me for those next 45 minutes. The next year Ben and I were in the same language arts class. We instantly became friends. I can easily say that a grand amount all of my memories from middle school and most of high school involve Ben. So much fun, so many jokes, so much b.s., such good friends.

Even though Ben and I live 2,500 miles away I always make a point to hang out with him when I visit back east. It always seems we pick right up where we left off the last time we saw each other. We also keep in pretty good touch through emails and the like.

Here's a pic of Ben (left) and I and another buddy of ours, Andrew (on the right) on a trip to New York City just before our junior year of high school. Damn....nearly 10 years ago.

Now, back to the main reason for this post. Ben is raising money for a 5K walk that he will be participating in which will be held in Philadelphia, PA on August 23. This is a fundraiser for the Lance Armstrong Foundation. I made a donation, and so should you. Everything helps. You may donate to Ben here.

This One Bit the Dust

2009-07-20T19:11:00.000-07:00

My 1992 Subaru Loyale has officially bit the dust. The timing belt has gone and I'm throwing in the towel. It'll cost more for me to fix than I want to pay forward, so I've posted this link on craig's page. Pay it a visit. Laugh. Cry. Make me an offer on my non-operable car. It was great transportation, especially in the winter.

Lost on Mt. Olympus? Fk That - Let's Go for a Rally-Ride!

2009-07-09T15:10:00.000-07:00

I have to be honest, this post was going to be about a group of "special" hikers who got lost on Mt. Olympus right outside of Salt Lake earlier today (read - are you fking kidding me????). Well, if you want to know a little more about their embarrassing fiasco, go toKSL.com, probably Salt Lake's premier online news source. If you live in Salt Lake and know Mt. Olympus, you know how ridiculous it is that these people got "lost" and had to call for "rescue."

Now, regarding what this post is really about. One of the guys from the British motorhead show, Top Gear got to sit in on a whirlwind rally-ride with bad-ass rally-racer Ken Block. Go get some tissues for the cleanup, this gets messy:

Ugh. Are your pants wet yet? If not, head over the face-tube and look this guy up...

Oh yea, and since this blog is great and I'm too lazy to figure out how to fit a wide-screen vid on here, you can view this clip in all it's glory on face-tube.

How to be Uncool

2009-07-06T15:44:00.000-07:00

Sure, when my buddies and I were younger we thought it was fun to race our red wagons down the hill that was our street, luge-style. We'd race each other and then crash into the bushes in my parent's front yard since we didn't have any brakes on our rigs. We were way cooler than these guys (turn off your sound unless you understand un-English):

New Name

2009-07-01T15:13:00.001-07:00

I changed the name of my blog. You may recall it as Everything Under the Sun. Honestly, I can't tell you how sick I became of that name shortly after creating this little plot on the world wide web wheneverago; I've wanted to change it's name ever since but never did anything about it, dig? That changed today. From here on out, I'm calling my blog Hype Machine. Now that's a nice, ambivalent name for a weblog. I see that you agree. Wonderful.

Now get a load of this. Since I decided to hold off on getting that sweet RIP 9 bike a few posts down, my lust for a 29er was egged towards Santa Cruz Bicycles shortly after I heard rumors of them putting out a 29-inch bike this coming season. Well, a quick read on their blog and here it is - a real-life sample of what the bike will look like when it hits the market:

Well there it is. My new lust-interest. Not.

They're making this thing outta carbon fiber, according to their blog, which is fine, if you want (i.e. can afford) carbon fiber. I, on the other hand, don't necessarily want a carbon fiber bike, nor do I want to afford (i.e. go broke) one. Granted, the Niner is sweet. But Santa Cruz has been doing bikes for-ev-er and I was over-psyched to hear they're putting out a 29er. But guys? C'mon.....carbon fiber? Fkna.

What's the Happs?

2009-06-29T18:20:00.000-07:00

Lately in the month of June:

Tina and a lazy Sunday.

Ty wrastles a pebble.

Josh reeling it in.

Half-time.

Tina having a go.

Oh snap. Breakfast and Sunday comics.

The eggs - they were incredible.

No Cheats

2009-06-19T09:27:00.000-07:00

I'll admit that I read a ton of blogs during the day. You typically find some pretty random, useless stuff on blogs (like mine) and then others have content that hits you like a brick. I perused Sage Cattabriga-Alosa's blog this morning and he had posted a paragraph from the University of Portland's commencement speech by a fellow named Paul Hawken. I read the paragraph and though, hmmm, that's cool. Then there was a link at the end to Paul's entire speech. I copy and pasted it below. Please, do yourself, and the world, a favor and read it.

Commencement Address to the Class of 2009
University of Portland, May 3rd, 2009

When I was invited to give this speech, I was asked if I could give a simple short talk that was "direct, naked, taut, honest, passionate, lean, shivering, startling, and graceful." No pressure there.

Let's begin with the startling part. Class of 2009: you are going to have to figure out what it means to be a human being on earth at a time when every living system is declining, and the rate of decline is accelerating. Kind of a mind-boggling situation... but not one peer-reviewed paper published in the last thirty years can refute that statement. Basically, civilization needs a new operating system, you are the programmers, and we need it within a few decades.

This planet came with a set of instructions, but we seem to have misplaced them. Important rules like don't poison the water, soil, or air, don't let the earth get overcrowded, and don't touch the thermostat have been broken. Buckminster Fuller said that spaceship earth was so ingeniously designed that no one has a clue that we are on one, flying through the universe at a million miles per hour, with no need for seatbelts, lots of room in coach, and really good food—but all that is changing.

There is invisible writing on the back of the diploma you will receive, and in case you didn't bring lemon juice to decode it, I can tell you what it says: You are Brilliant, and the Earth is Hiring. The earth couldn't afford to send recruiters or limos to your school. It sent you rain, sunsets, ripe cherries, night blooming jasmine, and that unbelievably cute person you are dating. Take the hint. And here's the deal: Forget that this task of planet-saving is not possible in the time required. Don't be put off by people who know what is not possible. Do what needs to be done, and check to see if it was impossible only after you are done.

When asked if I am pessimistic or optimistic about the future, my answer is always the same: If you look at the science about what is happening on earth and aren't pessimistic, you don't understand the data. But if you meet the people who are working to restore this earth and the lives of the poor, and you aren't optimistic, you haven't got a pulse. What I see everywhere in the world are ordinary people willing to confront despair, power, and incalculable odds in order to restore some semblance of grace, justice, and beauty to this world. The poet Adrienne Rich wrote, "So much has been destroyed I have cast my lot with those who, age after age, perversely, with no extraordinary power, reconstitute the world." There could be no better description. Humanity is coalescing. It is reconstituting the world, and the action is taking place in schoolrooms, farms, jungles, villages, campuses, companies, refuge camps, deserts, fisheries, and slums.

You join a multitude of caring people. No one knows how many groups and organizations are working on the most salient issues of our day: climate change, poverty, deforestation, peace, water, hunger, conservation, human rights, and more. This is the largest movement the world has ever seen. Rather than control, it seeks connection. Rather than dominance, it strives to disperse concentrations of power. Like Mercy Corps, it works behind the scenes and gets the job done. Large as it is, no one knows the true size of this movement. It provides hope, support, and meaning to billions of people in the world. Its clout resides in idea, not in force. It is made up of teachers, children, peasants, businesspeople, rappers, organic farmers, nuns, artists, government workers, fisherfolk, engineers, students, incorrigible writers, weeping Muslims, concerned mothers, poets, doctors without borders, grieving Christians, street musicians, the President of the United States of America, and as the writer David James Duncan would say, the Creator, the One who loves us all in such a huge way.

There is a rabbinical teaching that says if the world is ending and the Messiah arrives, first plant a tree, and then see if the story is true. Inspiration is not garnered from the litanies of what may befall us; it resides in humanity's willingness to restore, redress, reform, rebuild, recover, reimagine, and reconsider. "One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice," is Mary Oliver's description of moving away from the profane toward a deep sense of connectedness to the living world.

Millions of people are working on behalf of strangers, even if the evening news is usually about the death of strangers. This kindness of strangers has religious, even mythic origins, and very specific eighteenth-century roots. Abolitionists were the first people to create a national and global movement to defend the rights of those they did not know. Until that time, no group had filed a grievance except on behalf of itself. The founders of this movement were largely unknown -- Granville Clark, Thomas Clarkson, Josiah Wedgwood — and their goal was ridiculous on the face of it: at that time three out of four people in the world were enslaved. Enslaving each other was what human beings had done for ages. And the abolitionist movement was greeted with incredulity. Conservative spokesmen ridiculed the abolitionists as liberals, progressives, do-gooders, meddlers, and activists. They were told they would ruin the economy and drive England into poverty. But for the first time in history a group of people organized themselves to help people they would never know, from whom they would never receive direct or indirect benefit. And today tens of millions of
people do this every day. It is called the world of non-profits, civil society, schools, social entrepreneurship, non-governmental organizations, and companies who place social and environmental justice at the top of their strategic goals. The scope and scale of this effort is unparalleled in history.

The living world is not "out there" somewhere, but in your heart. What do we know about life? In the words of biologist Janine Benyus, life creates the conditions that are conducive to life. I can think of no better motto for a future economy. We have tens of thousands of abandoned homes without people and tens of thousands of abandoned people without homes. We have failed bankers advising failed regulators on how to save failed assets. We are the only species on the planet without full employment. Brilliant. We have an economy that tells us that it is cheaper to destroy earth in real time rather than renew, restore, and sustain it. You can print money to bail out a bank but you can't print life to bail out a planet. At present we are stealing the future, selling it in the present, and calling it gross domestic product. We can just as easily have an economy that is based on healing the future instead of stealing it. We can either create assets for the future or take the assets of the future. One is called restoration and the other exploitation. And whenever we exploit the earth we exploit people and cause untold suffering. Working for the earth is not a way to get rich, it is a way to be rich.

The first living cell came into being nearly 40 million centuries ago, and its direct descendants are in all of our bloodstreams. Literally you are breathing molecules this very second that were inhaled by Moses, Mother Teresa, and Bono. We are vastly interconnected. Our fates are inseparable. We are here because the dream of every cell is to become two cells. And dreams come true. In each of you are one quadrillion cells, 90 percent of which are not human cells. Your body is a community, and without those other microorganisms you would perish in hours. Each human cell has 400 billion molecules conducting millions of processes between trillions of atoms. The total cellular activity in one human body is staggering: one septillion actions at any one moment, a one with twenty-four zeros after it. In a millisecond, our body has undergone ten times more processes than there are stars in the universe, which is exactly what Charles Darwin foretold when he said science would discover that each living creature was a "little universe, formed of a host of self-propagating organisms, inconceivably minute and as numerous as the stars of heaven."

So I have two questions for you all: First, can you feel your body? Stop for a moment. Feel your body. One septillion activities going on simultaneously, and your body does this so well you are free to ignore it, and wonder instead when this speech will end. You can feel it. It is called life. This is who you are. Second question: who is in charge of your body? Who is managing those molecules? Hopefully not a political party. Life is creating the conditions that are conducive to life inside you, just as in all of nature. Our innate nature is to create the conditions that are conducive to life. What I want you to imagine is that collectively humanity is evincing a deep innate wisdom in coming together to heal the wounds and insults of the past.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once asked what we would do if the stars only came out once every thousand years. No one would sleep that night, of course. The world would create new religions overnight. We would be ecstatic, delirious, made rapturous by the glory of God. Instead, the stars come out every night and we watch television.

This extraordinary time when we are globally aware of each other and the multiple dangers that threaten civilization has never happened, not in a thousand years, not in ten thousand years. Each of us is as complex and beautiful as all the stars in the universe. We have done great things and we have gone way off course in terms of honoring creation. You are graduating to the most amazing, stupefying challenge ever bequested to any generation. The generations before you failed. They didn't stay up all night. They got distracted and lost sight of the fact that life is a miracle every moment of your existence. Nature beckons you to be on her side. You couldn't ask for a better boss. The most unrealistic person in the world is the cynic, not the dreamer. Hope only makes sense when it doesn't make sense to be hopeful. This is your century. Take it and run as if your life depends on it. (end of speech)

Now, I couldn't tell you who delivered the commencement speech at my graduation from university in May of 2006, and I certainly don't remember how it made me feel inside. But Paul's comments in this speech are some of the most realistic ideas, principles and outlooks that we could all benefit from. I guess skiing isn't the only thing worth living for.

Enjoy this sunset pic I snapped a few weeks ago.

Bike Sike

2009-06-15T15:41:00.000-07:00

Sike...like decided to wait on the bike. Obligatory sad face :( I could use money in other areas right now and will wait until next spring to get this, or perhaps a cooler, bike. It'll taste even sweeter then, I figure.

It's been raining like crazy the last couple weeks. Unlike anything I've ever seen in Utah before. Aside from that, I've been dying to make another trip up to the Spiral Jetty on the Great Salt Lake. Tina and I went up there this past weekend and, well, it rained. Time for an obligatory photo dump:

Tina had fun, too.

Back at the home front Hobbes wanted in on some of the camera action. Here he is, psyched as always, and in great form.

Seriously...how do you punish this kid for picking through the garbage when you aren't home?

Mix Tape

2009-06-09T09:03:00.000-07:00

I found some old mix tapes the other day while cleaning out my closet. They're probably from high school. It's kind of terrible that I don't have tape deck to listen to these on - apparently cassette tapes are as far out the door as, hmmmm, 8-tracks.

Regarding what's coming in....a Niner R.I.P. 9. I'll be building it from the ground up. I'm pscyhed and will be po' for a while. Hope to have this thing done and ridable by the end of July. Swoll.

The Tramp

2009-05-27T14:33:00.000-07:00

I had the privilege of house sitting for some friends of mine over Memorial day weekend. They have a pretty cool house and a great kitchen. Check the tuna fish sando I made on Saturday afternoon!

Oh, so good!

Another fun thing about staying at this house is that they have an in-ground trampoline. What a blast....

Tina boosting.

Spring

2009-04-30T09:03:00.000-07:00

As I was brushing my teeth this morning I decided to take a stroll over to the front of my apartment and peek out the window to do a spot-check on the weather. I was barely able to see the sun as I tried to squint through all the dirt on the windows. Might be time to clean them again.

Grass in the front "yard."

Also, I discovered my D200 has an image overlay function to create double exposures. Here's a poor example of one taken of the street lamp by my casa.

It Has a lot to do With the People You're With, The Music Being Played & The Shoes On Your Feet

2009-04-17T09:30:00.000-07:00

Yeah, all that and more. I was digging through a couple pics of me doing a few of the things I've loved or love. Enjoy this shameless eyecandy.

I haven't snowboarded since the 04/05 season. A favorite picture of me caught at Brighton in 2001. Lame boost.

I've kept a longboard on hand in one capacity or another and really enjoy getting out on it when the weather is nice. Get low.

I picked up freeheel skiing in 2004. This was taken in June of 2008 at Snowbird. No cheats.

This is a repost of an image caught in March of 2008 in the Brighton backcountry. It was a deep day, but I've seen deeper.

The 08/09 season brought about many changes. One of them was me picking up alpine skiing again - something I learned to do when I was two years old (thanks, Dad). Just another day at Brighton - crushing it.

Maybe I'll post some more sweets later. Have a great weekend, everyone.

Soundtracks To Life

2009-04-15T10:44:00.000-07:00

I discovered the band Collective Soul when I was about 13 years old. I was in the middle of seventh grade, didn't talk to girls and was living in Delaware at the time. The cd came from one of those "Buy 7 CDs for One Cent" promotional offers that used to come by the bundle in the mail years ago. A Collective Soul CD was one of the 7 CDs I claimed on that offer. The trick is they charge you months later, about 11 bucks or so per each CD you ordered. Well, my mom told them I moved to New Zealand and I never ended up paying a penny of the $77.00 or so they tried to nab me for. Seriously though, I was 13 years old - where was I going to come up with $77.00 to pay for those CDs? How rude of them to think that I could actually afford their silly, albeit trick, offer.

But man, that first Collective Soul CD I picked up put me on a long and winding road during which their music has weaved in and out of my life at random times and moments. Every time I hear a song by them, or put one of their CDs on (yes, I still use CDs) or listen to them on my iPod, it just makes me smile.

Six Days On...

2009-04-10T15:39:00.000-07:00

...Time for two days off. Enjoy the moon, ya'll.

Tally Marks

2009-03-31T09:49:00.000-07:00

When I first moved back out west it was for college. One of the highlighting features of going to school in Utah was that I knew I would have the opportunity to ski a lot more than I ever had in the past. My freshman year I logged 120 days on the snow - never for work, always for play - it was my longest season ever. Throughout college I continued to tally every day I skied. Not so much anymore. It isn't about how many days I can get on the snow each season now - rather, it's more important to me that I have fun each and every day I'm out there; with my friends, all of us enjoying each other and the playground we live in.

Sick Day

2009-03-27T09:42:00.000-07:00

Sick like yeah.....got a new camera! She's a Nikon D200. She takes pictures and makes them look nice. I also heard we got a dusting in the Wasatch. Four new feet of snow. Sick...like, yeah.

Fine Details

2009-03-16T11:09:00.000-07:00

I enjoy taking pictures of things up close - so close that the background is nearly, if not completely, out of focus. I played a little with the levels and curves in this photo and think it looks a little better than the original. Cheating? I think not.

Who Dat Soulja Boy...

2009-03-03T12:50:00.000-08:00

Shut up. What a stupid song. I just randomly found out that my old car turned over 100,000 miles on it's spedomoter. I'll have to live vicariously through my younger brother, Brian, who was most likely driving the car when it rolled over the 100K mark.

I bought this car when I was 19. It was right after my freshman year of college and I thought I was going to be transferring to a school back east. Little did I know that I'd be heading back out to Utah to finish school six months later, with a two-wheel drive car. Great. I've since wised up. My madre now has this little gem and I'm proud to say it serves her well as her daily grocery-getter. Besides, my mom looks way hotter in this car than she did in her old Explorer. Yes, my mom is hot and no you cannot hit on her. She's happily married.

But damn do I miss driving this thing....

Yes, "randomly" there was a car somewhat identical parked right behind mine when this picture was taken many years ago....

V Day

2009-02-17T10:09:00.001-08:00

My girlfriend and I think valentine's day is ridiculous. We actually didn't even get to spend the day together. She was up in Jackson Hole coaching ski racing and I stayed here in town. It was a special day, nonetheless, though. Brighton received 17" over Friday night so two buddies and myself jetted up Big Cottonwood for a little homecoming party of our own. We skied the entire mountain, lookers right to left and even hit the backside of Western. Incredible. Here's a moment in time my buddy Tim captured of me coming down a shot in Mary Chutes.

This was also a special day for me - as I'm back to skiing four weeks after knee surgery. I'm alpine skiing now. And I'm very grateful for the support and love I received during my recovery time from not only my friends, but from my girlfriend, Tina. Thanks everyone!

Be Your Own Change

2009-02-10T08:07:00.000-08:00

That doesn't even make sense. But if you want to play around with something fun and entertaining, check this out.

What Goes Around Comes Around

2009-01-28T10:13:00.000-08:00

Back in the '70s there was a harsh drought in Southern California. As a result of this drought, many homeowners could not keep their pools filled. Enter the Z-Boys. Led by then-kids Stacey Peralta, Tony Alva and Jay Adams, the Z-Boys brought surfing to the pavement. When they discovered the dry pools - and that they could skate them - they began to pave the way for some of the most well-known skate boarders of our time like Tony Hawk, Andy MacDonald and Bob Burnquist.

The Z-Boys began experimenting in the vertical world by skating pools and helped further progress the widespread popularity of the sport, in a way, helping it become what it is today in all it's disciplines. One of the original Z-Boys, Stacey Peralta, went on to become one of the more successful of the bunch and later produced a documentary, Dogtown and Z-Boys, chronicling this fascinating point in time.

Now, looking at this sufferfest of an economic crisis that we're mulling through, I find it fascinating as hell that adults and kids alike in Southern California are doing the same thing the Z-Boys did; only this time around it's not a drought caused by weather that's keeping pools dry, it's the drought of our economy.

Going There

2009-01-27T13:16:00.000-08:00

I plan to head to Japan for some ski time in March of 2010. Why Japan? Because it's the next Utah. No real details on exactly where the trip will go, but it will be good, for sure (hint: it's in Northern Japan). I don't want to spoil the surprise just yet. Now I need to get a passport. Finally.

Apple 8 | PC 2

2009-01-25T15:28:00.000-08:00

That was the count of Macs vs. PCs as I walked into a coffee shop this afternoon. Here's some pics from yesterday up Little Cottonwood Canyon. Yeah, I edited the piss out of them.

Among Other Things...

2009-01-21T12:18:00.000-08:00

The next 8 years are going to very interesting/exciting. Additionally, let us not forget to reflect and embrace how historic the events of yesterday were. Buckle up.

Laid Up - Laid Back

2009-01-15T12:04:00.000-08:00

Every four hours I take a pill. This little pill makes the pain from my knee surgery go away. For a little while. Soon, I won't need the take the pills anymore. Every day my knee gets stronger.

That's right, I had knee surgery on Monday, January 12th. I tore the meniscus in my left knee while skiing two days after Christmas. The journey, from this point forward, only gets better.

Once Upon a Time

2009-01-11T11:33:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time, in May of 2008, I went to Chicago with Tina. We spent an entire day touring the city with friends. The weather was beautiful, I took so many great photos and was so excited to get them home and upload them to my computer. The uploading never happened, as I lost EVERY photo when my camera's memory card was inadvertently reformatted at the end of that same day. The next day we made another quick round of the city before having to fly home. Here's a quickie:

B & W

2009-01-06T14:27:00.000-08:00

We've been seeing storms romp across the valley and up into the Wasatch pretty regularly the past couple of weeks. I've been out of the game with a twisted (hopefully just a twist...) knee for last bit, so it's been great fun watching everyone else get excited about going up and enjoying the goodness. I've been enjoying the snow in other ways.

Cheers to a healthy season.

Phoblog

2009-01-02T13:15:00.000-08:00

It looks like my blog has turned into a photoblog. Could I shorten that phrase to Phoblog? Or maybe Phob-log? Hmmm, I think so.

Check that out. A 0.125 sec exposure with a quick twist of the camera. Don't puke.

Flotsam and Jetsam

2008-12-19T15:01:00.000-08:00

This is the Spiral Jetty. It's a piece of landscape art that was constructed in 1970 (I believe....but I've been wrong before; nope, I'm right. CHECK IT.). It lives in the Great Salt Lake in the great state of Utah. The spiral itself is pretty great - though it serves no purpose, other than looking great. In high-water years, it is flooded out of sight by rising water and other times, when the water level of the lake is low enough, the rocks that comprise the Jetty are seen sitting plainly in the salty bed of the lake. It smells horrible out here, by the way.

For this picture, I was lucky enough to show up when the water was glassed-over and pooling within the entire spiral. Special, right? Appreciate it.

Legacy Bridge Wanderings

2008-12-17T08:54:00.000-08:00

These photos were taken this past July up around the Legacy Bridge area of the Univeristy of Utah campus. The bridge was one of several structures built for the 2002 Winter Olympics on the U's campus. I blinked when Apollo Anton Ohno walked across this bridge and missed him entirely. He. So. Fast. Like this train....

This next photo is an HDR (high dynamic range) rendition of the bridge itself, looking west towards lower campus.

Incredible.

All things...

2008-12-11T20:13:00.000-08:00

Just a tid bit from a photo-shooting spree I went on late last spring around Salt Lake. Unnh.

American Auto Industry Bail Out

2008-12-10T09:23:00.000-08:00

The sad fact is it's not even a bail out. It's a bridge loan. Which is an even higher-risk loan, with a higher interest rate than typical money loans. And all this business about lobbyists, it's so true it's sad. I guess they're trying to save jobs, which is a good thing. And why should I be bothered by the fact that I'll lose value in the cost of my Subaru? I paid $800.00 for it - $600.00 of which was comprised of my economic stimulus check. So really, the car only cost me $200....

Advertising

2008-12-09T12:19:00.000-08:00

I heard all it's about is arresting the human intelligence for a long enough time in order to get money from a person.

An Article from a Skiing Magazine

2008-11-11T14:29:00.000-08:00

Grant lives at sea level. Grant drinks beer. Grant drinks so much beer that he has to brew it himself in order to remain financially solvent. Grant goes skiing in the Andes, however, and drinks nothing but water and Gatorade. And Grant’s friends begin calling him “Jennifer.” Cruel? Maybe. But is the mockery just? Does drinking at higher elevations really make a difference?

Turns out the I’m-from-New-Jersey-and-am-skiing-in-Utah excuse only pardons gaper powder skills. Most of the prevailing wisdom that altitude gets you wasted-er is founded on what Fox News calls “facts” and the rest of us call “utter bullshit.” Specifically, it’s based on a quasi-scientific study from the 1930s performed not by a doctor but by a psychologist.

According to a 1995 Austrian study published in the Annals of Internal Medicine, boozing at 10,000 feet and at sea level produced identical levels of wanting to go to Denny’s and yell, “Spring Break ’08, bitches!” And a University of Texas article cited “no credible research evidence [that] alcohol makes you more intoxicated at high altitudes compared to sea level.”

Dr. Peter Hackett of the Institute for Altitude Medicine in Telluride concurs. “I recommend people not drink alcohol for the first couple of days at altitude. It depresses the breathing and could cause mountain sickness. And mountain sickness feels exactly like a hangover. It can be hard to tell the difference between the two. That’s the first 24 hours. After that, the body acclimatizes quickly. By the third day, you can drink as much as you like.”

******************************************************************************************************
My thoughts:
Touché.

I Beg To Differ...

2008-11-11T13:51:00.000-08:00

.......NOT.

Fun Size

2008-11-03T11:47:00.000-08:00

So I have beef with candy-bar makers and their ineptitude to correctly market certain products. Most notably, 'fun size' candy bars. See image below:

For the sake of all things unconveyable, let's just say the image of the 'fun size' snickers, above, is "actual size." Now, my beef; this isn't 'fun size' - this is a TEASER.

Da Bird

2008-10-16T15:39:00.000-07:00

So, remember that little blurb I wrote about my love affair with Brighton a few posts down? Well, I kinda feel like I'm cheating on her this season. Yeah, I got a Snowbird pass this year. F me, right? Snowbird has a tunnel. I won't use it. But, I did get a deal on my pass (one reason for switching mountains this year). Hopefully it snows a lot and don't miss my alma mater too much. I know, this is ridiculous, but still....

Stimulus Check = Push-Button 4WD

2008-06-17T07:00:00.000-07:00

Ok. It's official. I'm horrible at updating this blog. I love reading other people's blogs, yet loathe putting new material up on mine. It's not that my life is disinteresting, I just never feel like sitting down at a computer and typing about myself. I guess this is why I've never been able to keep a solid journal over the years, either.

Well, here it is. My 1992 Subaru Loyale, which has been affectionately deemed (through suggestion of a very good friend), The Lieutenant. It's got 124,000 miles and I paid less than $1000 for the guy.

Pretty sexy, right? The LT has a 5-speed manual transmission with a push-button 4WD on the stick shift. And look at that white paint....sooooo gooood! That's the LT.

ed - 11/19/08: Oh yeah, behold - the mighty push-button!!

Land-Locked Seagulls

2008-05-04T15:22:00.000-07:00

From birth until the age of 11, I lived just outside of Denver, Colorado. Probably the single-most confusing thing about my childhood was the fact that there were seagulls in Colorado. I knew this to be strange due to my infrequent trips to the Jersey shore whilst back east visiting relatives - seagulls belonged at the beach, not at 5280 feet above sea level; no, that's just not right.

However, here I've been in Salt Lake City, Utah since I was 18 and these silly birds are here too. I don't get it. They're clearly not here for the skiing. Following are some botched attempts at capturing these displaced water-fowl:

*Ed. Note 5/6/08: Great - so Utah's state bird is the seagull. This just keeps getting better and better. Thanks for this tip goes to one of my faithful blog readers.

**Ed. Note 5/7/08: Again, this post has stirred up more than I could have really hoped for. Apparently these birds worked "miracles" back in the mid-1850s. Check out wikipedia's facts HERE.

Ah Ski Ski Ski

2008-03-18T10:37:00.001-07:00

Here's a picture of me summing up the 2006-2007 ski season:
Photo: T. Felton
That's right. This season was all-things not great in terms of snow.

Now, here's a picture of me summing up the 2007-2008 ski season:
Photo: T. Stark.
Can you tell the difference? That's right. So, this winter's been good. And when I say, good, I mean it in the sense that I don't care if I'm using proper grammer or not (good vs. well...yeah, whatever). Just look at that picture - I'm so happy that I could be peeing my pants and you wouldn't even know it because it's literally been balls-deep all season long.

Maybe this year just seems so much better than last year because it hardly snowed at all last year. No. That's not it. It's the fact that nearly every Friday Ullr has turned on the storm spigot and lets the flakes fall all-weekend-long. This past weekend, especially...some of the dryest snow I've skied in my life. I'm going to shut up now.

The Love Affair

2008-02-21T14:35:00.000-08:00

I first became acquainted with Brighton ski resort in 1992. Our family took a ski vacation out to Utah during spring break that year. Early one morning on our way to Big Cottonwood Canyon I saw a road sign for the University of Utah - I told my parents I was going to come to college out here. "Sure, Joe..." they said, I was 9 years old.

In 2001 I packed up and moved out to Utah for, ahem, college....and the skiing. Little did I know that I would reacquaint myself with Brighton that winter. Though not having not seen her for a little over 9 years, I wasn't surprised that we hit it off almost immediately. It felt great to be cradled by her back bowls, deep snow and laid-back crowd.

There's no way that back in 2001 I could have told anybody I would still be skiing at Brighton today; 7 years and nearly 550 ski days later, we still get along as well as the day we first met. Sometimes my affair with Brighton reminds me of Greg Noll, a big wave surfer featured in the movie Riding Giants, who moved to Hawaii after high school and fell in love with the huge waves crashing along the breaks at Waimea Bay. Sure, a bit of a stretch, water vs. snow, beaches vs. mountains, Hawaii vs. Utah, but whatever.

Brighton is good.

ph: Evan L.

Exit 4 on I-80 West

2008-02-13T09:31:00.000-08:00

This past weekend was an interesting one. Instead of going skiing, a buddy and I decided to trek out to the Bonneville Salt Flats in Western Utah. There's a lot more to why we didn't go skiing, and I'm only going to get angry if I delve into that story; besides, it would at best be a tangent and we all know that staying on topic is much, much better.

Yeah, so, back on topic. The Salt Flats are, well, flat...and salty. After exiting the highway (exit 4, clever, I know...) you head north on some road following signs to the Bonneville Salt Flats. Ending up on a two-lane road that traverses across the Salt Flats, you think "my gosh, could this be it??" Then, it gets better, the road ends - in, literally, the middle of nowhere. Nothing is there to hold you back from doing whatever you please. In our case, we took the time to snap a few photos and then drove my buddy's car really, really fast on the flats.

After seeing all there was to see (read: not entirely too much), we packed back in the Subie and headed back home. Go check this place out sometime if you ever get the chance. In fact, give me a call, I'll ride shotgun.

Yeah, "I used to skate"

2008-02-12T07:59:00.000-08:00

So many people make this claim if and when skateboarding is brought up in conversation. But how many people can truthfully say this and, at the same time, actually mean it?

This past weekend I found myself flipping through a skate mag while I was waiting for a window to be fixed on my car. It was probably one of the best things that I have done for myself in a long time (read the mag). Silly - you ask? Not so. I spent the better part of my adolesence with a skateboard under my feet. Outside of my playing lacrosse in high school, skating was what I did with all my friends at that time. We skated every day after school, all weekend long and even talked, somehow, our parents into shuttling us up to Philly, from Delaware, to skate the FDR skatepark under I-95 a handful of times each summer.

Back to the mag - I wish I knew then what I know now. It really hit me, reading the articles and appreciating the pictures, how anti-establishment skating really is. Between the ages of 13-17 I never really took in, evaluated or understood much of what skating meant as a whole. Rather, I knew what it meant to my friends and I and that's all there was to it.

We all grewup in middle-class families that lived in the suburbs. We didn't know squat about anti-establishment and didn't give a damn about anything outside of our own neighborhood. But now, looking back, after finishing college and being thrust out into the 'real world', I can only wonder how and who I would be now if I was truly anti-this and anti-that at a younger, more impressionable age.

This is my buddy, Matt, circa 2000.

Cheers to the youth. I know I'd give anything to be a kid again.

Alta

2008-02-08T14:01:00.000-08:00

Ahhhhhh. Alta ski resort. What started out as a quaint mining town in the 1800s has now grown into a world-renowned ski resort; famous for harboring 500+ annual inches of Utah's 'greatest snow on earth'...yeah, blah blah blah....a couple things come to mind when I think of this place: Altaholics, Alta-Egos and the fact that my friends who ride shredsticks can't come here with me if I choose, wait, if I'm dragged into skiing here.

A few thoughts that come to mind within this triptych:

Altaholics: These are the out-of-state guys and gals from back east and out west that make yearly, often multiple time-a-season, pilgrimages to the glorious state of Utah with one purpose, ok, two purposes: To patronize what they see as one of the last 'pure' skiing establishments in the Nation and to complain about the estranged liquor laws of our fine state.

Alta-Egos: Usually found amongst skiers that have grown up in Utah, learned to ski at Alta and will continue to ski there until they die or it doesn't snow anymore - whichever happens first. Here's a typical conversation would go with someone who has an Alta-ego:

1. "So for this party tomorrow night, I need directions to your house."
2. "Sure, buddy. We're at 300 South and 800 East, right by the Sinclair."
1. "Where is that in relation to Alta??"

Sadly, the above is no joke.

Snowboarders aren't allowed: The majority of my friends ski. And many of my friends snowboard. Usually, we enjoy skiing and riding together. Yeah, well, that's why Brighton is better.

I will merit this skiing establishment in that it has some of the finest terrain in the Wasatch. The only downfall: After a big dump it gets skied out faster than you can wipe your own ass.

*Edit - Yes, I also have tons of friends that ski at Alta. Most of this post is meant to be taken as toungue-in-cheek. Thanks for reading.

November is Many Things

2007-11-07T19:50:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone. Joe here. November is many things. The first thing that happens in November for me is my birthday. I turned 25 on Friday, November 2. I've made it. I'm half-way to 50 and only need to work another 45 years before I can retire. Actually, I'll probably never retire.

Being 25 has given me mixed feelings about growing up. I feel like there were so many things I missed out on while growing up and while in college. Those that know what I'm talking about, well, you just know - and those that don't, don't worry about it.....'cause I'm over it.

I've started paying my own car insurance (I know...a little late jumping on this train; thanks Mom and Dad for helping out way longer than you should have). I've also started paying more attention to the world around me and am starting to become more aware of how my actions today could affect how I may be living in the future. Before this turns into a rant on carbon footprints and whether or not global warming is blah blah, so on and so forth, just know that I've started to open my eyes a little more regarding the decisions I make about how I live. Ok, when you boil it down I just try to keep the lights off at home except in the room I'm in. The bottom line, I have a ways to go in becoming globally conscious, but it's a start.

November also brings colder weather. And colder weather in Utah usually means snow. Last year this wasn't the case, as our winter was, well, what winter...? We're due for a good amount of snow this year. I can feel it. The winter crew is assembling and we're all starting to get excited for the season ahead of us.

Until next time....

Subaru-a-Boo-Ba-Ru

2007-10-08T18:01:00.000-07:00

It seems like every car company out there has a good thing going at one time or another - they have their eggs in a bunch of different baskets and their cars look great. Let's take Subaru, for example. Their 1987 GL Wagon is a timeless classic - those that know this are very well aware of the weight those words bear. Outback wagons in general have always had a decent, clean yet crisp look and feel to them.

Then in the early 90's when Subaru introduced to us the Outback Sport, our stomaches churned a little in the uneasy direction. The car looked more like a bubble waiting to be popped than it did an all-wheel-drive, gas-efficient mini-wagon. A couple years ago Subaru took the Outback Sport back to the drawing board and came out with something I think all of our paletts enjoyed. The car was good looking, had awesome looking head lamps, had a decent shape that said, "drive me" and left you with an overall impression of "man, I want one of those," if you didn't already have one.

Don't get me wrong. A Subaru will always and forever be on my wishlist. But I have to ask the people at Subaru what they were thinking when they let this design make it off the production line and skid into driveway's across America:

I have to ask, WTF, guys at Subaru? WTF??!! This has got to be the ugliest, most unoriginal design I have seen for a car yet. I was driving around town this afternoon and saw a blue guy just like it. I thought, hmmmm, maybe a Kia?? Hell no sirs and madams. It was a brand-spankin' new Subaru Outback Sport. Paul Hogan (Crocodile Dundee) would have pooped his pants if he saw this car.

If this is a testament of what is to come from Subaru, I am truly afraid. I don't like how this car looks, end of story. I'd rather be stuck driving a Toyota FJ cruiser, or better yet, a Camry wagon; do they even make those anymore? Hopefully this is just an in-between design and the guys at Subaru are cooking up something great that's going to make everyone that buys one of these 2008 Outback Sports look like a fool. Congratulations guys, this is the worst-looking hatchback I've seen yet.